One thing I have learnt from being a parent, apart from the realisation that you will never have a decent nights sleep again, is the ability to accept change.
Because I’ve never been very gracious or accepting with regards to change.
I am a creature of habit, who thrives on routine. I like to plan events well in advance, and alterations to my schedule can feel very unsettling.
However, when kids are involved, anything is possible. Plus, they are changing all the time so you have to learn to adapt and accommodate.
I found this change lark quite a task at the beginning. Just when you get used to something, guess what, it’s time for change.
For example, you get the hang of bottle feeds, then it’s time for weaning (but what if he chokes!). You enjoy pushing him in the pram, with him facing you, then it’s time for him to face outwards (but I won't be able to see him!). You love the security of him in the moses basket next to your bed, then it’s time for him to switch to a cot (but he will be in his own room!). You don’t mind changing nappies, then your mum buys you a Mickey Mouse potty for the dreaded potty training (everyone tells me how gross this is!). And all the other changes in between.
See what I mean?
I used to wail at Mark, “Oh lets not do that yet, he’s still a baba.”
Then you realise you don’t want your child not to progress, or heaven forbid, you get left behind.
Not that I’m an expert, but I do think some mums love to rush to the next stage, when perhaps you could enjoy the current stage a tiny bit longer. Some mums, I have witnessed, pride themselves on how advanced their little one is.
Is it really a competition? Let's not forget that babies are human beings and therefore can progress at different times in their life. There are recommended ages and average times, but as we all know, recommendations and averages can simply be recommendations and averages!
Yet, nowadays I have embraced this change factor with a lighter heart. I‘ve had to, otherwise I fear the next chapter, and that really isn’t the point.
I’ve also had to realise that plans can alter very swiftly, due to Tommy’s sleep pattern, his general health, or his dirty nappy.
These days if I make arrangements, I know it’s wise to add, “All being well with Tommy.” He has to be my priority now, and his sleep and health can determine what goes on.
Many has been the time that I’ve had to text a friend and warn them Tommy is still deep in his morning nap so we will be at their house later than expected.
Many has been the time Mark and I are about to leave our house, when one of us has thought, what's that smell? Oh wait for it, here we go again...
So you see, I've had to realise change is not necessary the enemy. It's just a huge part of my life, and it should be treated with respect, not suspicion and frustration.