Thursday, 17 October 2013

The unknown

The unknown can be a mysteriously dark and murky place.
Hiding in shady corners could be daunting prospects, behind closed doors there may be frightening dilemmas.
The unknown often keeps you awake at night, aiding your over active imagination, until finally you are too exhausted to think.
Or the unknown can sneak into your peaceful dreams, disturbing and interrupting, until you awake with terrifying thoughts etched into your mind.
But the unknown is not always unpleasant.
Sometimes the unknown is a sunny, welcoming, far away land, you love to escape to.
It could be full of your favourite fantasies.
The unknown could be somewhere you drift to, at the end of a rainbow, at the bottom of the turquoise ocean, or on a shining star in a velvet sky.
I am being faced with my own personal unknown.
Some days it's a joy. Other days it's a nightmare.
Oh unknown, how you can tempt and tease, and confuse me.
I am now 4 days over due. Baby T does not want to join the outside world yet.
I am full of mixed emotions about the most challenging change I have ever faced in my life.
Of course I am ecstatic about meeting him, the son my husband and I have created, and I've carried inside me for 40 weeks.
Alas with every high you can't help but dwell on a low.
Child birth is beginning to scare me a little, the pain, the concerns, that pesky unknown.
The huge responsibility of parenthood and the well being of a life you brought into the world.
And then I think about his tiny face staring back at me, and I am overwhelmed with a fierce love and protectiveness towards someone I haven't even met yet.
One thing's for sure about my forthcoming unknown, dear readers, you can be sure I'll tell you all about it.

2 comments:

Amel said...

I pray that you'll have a smooth delivery...your baby is lucky to have you and hubby as parents. I'm sure of that. I was born 10 days past the due date, but at that time there was no ultrasound yet, so dunno how it's rated in this present world he he...but anyway, we're waiting for your story excitedly! :-D

The World According To Me said...

Thanks Amel, nice of you to say he'll be lucky to have us as parents. I'm being induced on Sunday if he still hasn't made an appearance!