My significant other thinks I am grafting away at my photography course work. He’s watching Arsenal (they’re winning, so he’s happy) but I’m easily distracted (one day I’ll be a professional photographer, so I’ll be happy too) and spherical aberration isn’t doing it for me tonight.
And why the distraction, you may well ask? Well to put it bluntly, the words ‘8 weeks sentence’ are bouncing around in that brain of mine. Lord only knows what it must be like for you.
Allow me to introduce myself, sorry where are my manners? My name is Nikki. I am 36 years old (37 in 6 weeks and 2 days, but who’s counting) and I am a cheese and George Michael fan. No don’t worry, I am not Heather from Eastenders, although my friends love to point out the similarities with the cheese adoration and the musical passion.
Erm, are you still there? I hope you don’t think ‘oh here we go again, another nutter who watches Eastenders and thinks she knows me.’
You would be right though (not about the nutter bit, I hasten to add) I don’t know you. I know that I love listening to Freedom, Everything She Wants, Waiting For The Day, I Knew You Were Waiting For Me, Amazing, etc (just a few of my favourites). I know my house is a happy house when George is singing on my CD player. I know one of my most cherished memories is when my dear late brother took me to my first George Michael concert. And I know that I have watched and read interviews where I have praised your sense of humour and admired your intelligent views and ideas.
I must confess, I have been mocked and congratulated for my George loyalty, and yes I was at your latest (electrifying, if I do say so myself) concert where you thanked your loyal fans (hey, it’s always nice to be appreciated!). I do hope now at a time like this you are taking some kind of comfort from your fans. Although I am sure Kenny and your family and friends support and love would be top of your list right now.
We aren’t given a rule book, are we? We are not born into this world and handed a leather bound book and told, ‘here you are, just consult this book every time you are not sure which path to take or how to behave and cope with certain situations.’ We muddle along, making decisions, sometimes thinking we know best only to find out that perhaps we know diddly squat.
They say it’s all a lesson, a learning curb, it will all make sense one day. I hope it does anyway! I would love it to all fall into place one day.
They say our greatest glory is not in never falling but in rising every time we fall (Confucius) and I am inclined to agree with that one.
We all have the power within us to turn our life around, to fight our demons and become a better person. Of course I realise this is harder for some people than others.
I am not here to judge anyone, to look down on anyone or take the moral high ground and scorn anyone. How could I? I’ve pulled some corkers in my time but I like to think I’ve learnt from them. And I would like to think I could comfort and put a smile on someone’s face if they needed it. Particularly yours. At a time like this.
Take care of yourself George. Be kind to yourself and those who care about you.
PS If you ever feel the urge to write back, my address is at the top of this page. I promise not to be one of these seedy people who contact those dirty newspapers. I would be enormously honoured and you would make this girl immensely happy. Oh well, you can’t blame a girl for trying!