Saturday, 20 June 2009

Going...going...gone.

He’s gone.
Mysterious man has not so mysteriously disappeared.
Again.
It’s different this time.
This time I knew it would happen.
I was not surprised or confused.
I was not hurt or bewildered.
I sensed the outcome.
I was ready for the outcome.
I was even relived at the outcome.
You can’t pretend somebody is something they are not.
You can’t pretend a relationship can turn into something it can not.
I’m glad I had the opportunity to see him again, to listen to his explanations, to understand his reasons, to learn more about the man I thought I knew. (Crikey, I sound like an Elaine Paige and Barbra Dickinson song, I know his so well.)
People ask me if I’m okay, if I’ve heard from him. I’m honestly fine, I say. No I haven’t heard from him, I don’t expect to nor do I want to. I sense some peoples sympathy. But I laugh it off. One day I’ll get it right, I’ll meet Mr Right, I say. Until then I am happy to be single.
Again.
It wasn’t the perfect relationship I thought it would be.
He wasn’t the perfect man I thought he would be.
At least I know that now.
I’m not full of what could have been.
I now know it could never have been.
Funny how you can read the signs completely wrong.
Funny how sometimes something you are so sure of can turn into something you are not sure of at all.
Life goes on.
The sky is still blue. (Well, in England it's often more grey than blue.)
I haven’t fallen apart.
I haven’t given up on love or life.
I’m still going out with my friends and enjoying myself. I’m still taking photographs and writing my blog. I’m still enjoying life in the not so new office.
Maybe I’m a little more cautious.
Maybe I don’t want to get my fingers burnt again.
But maybe I know I probably will.
If you don’t take a few risks how will you benefit from a few rewards?
Life isn’t meant to be simple, is it?
Life is far from simple at times.
But who wants a simple life anyway? If everything was simple how would we learn valuable lessons? How would we appreciate the good times from the bad times? I’ll take the rough with the smooth. I’ll carry on realising some things just aren’t meant to be.
It’s nothing personal.
It’s not a tragedy.
It’s not a disaster.
It’s just the way it is sometimes.
And I’m fine with that.

18 comments:

Dav DiDi said...

Oh well, maybe he is just not meant for you ..

Cheers, there are plenty of guys out there .. and if he don't appreciate you, someone, somewhere, will appreciate you :)

spangleystar said...

As one door closes another one (or two)opens ;o)
xxx

Nick Phillips said...

I'm sorry to hear that but take heart, there's someone else out there just waiting for you :D

Amel's Realm said...

Sorry to hear about this, but yeah, I'm glad to hear you got to hear his explanations and that you haven't given up on love.

HUGS!!!!!!

Blur Ting said...

Well, at least you had some nice moments. Better to have loved and lost...

I wanted to say something but all the lines have already been said by you but I know you're a wise girl, you'll be fine. Maybe a little disapppointed but you'll find someone better. for sure.

Leigh Russell said...

Every near miss is one near miss closer to a hit - not sure that's a very good metaphor, but you know what I mean. You're out there, paddling your little canoe, and one day soon you'll find your island. Hmmm. I think I'd better stop with the metaphors!
Please email me on leighrussell2009@live.co.uk if you want a virtual signature for your copy of Cut Short. I hope you enjoy it! Let me know - and if it's positive, please put a review on amazon. Apparently it helps. (Helps what? I'm not sure. But it helps.)

The Real Mother Hen said...

I'm convinced that someone is definitely out there, waiting for you.

The World According To Me said...

Hello Dav Didi. I think you're right. Some things just aren't meant to be.

I hope you're okay.

Thanks for saying someone will appreciate me!

The World According To Me said...

How true, my dear Spangleystar.

That door will open, maybe to expose a snake or two?! xxx

The World According To Me said...

Hi Nick

How are you?

I hope so. I've kissed enough frogs, I'm still hoping to find my prince.

The World According To Me said...

Thanks Amel.

How was your holiday?
Must pay you a visit.

Yeah I'm glad I got to hear his explanations and find things out for myself. Hugs back!

The World According To Me said...

Hello Blur.

Hope you're well.

It's all experience hey. Good or bad!

The World According To Me said...

Hello Leigh

I'm loving your metaphors.

I'm loving your book too! I'm off to bed very soon to continue. I'd like to write a review afterwards too, I will bear that in mind.

The World According To Me said...

The Real Mother Hen.

I'll hold you to that!

See you soon. Take care out there!

shello said...

I'm sorry to hear about this. but...ya know...being single rocks! :D

WaterLearner said...

From your post, I know that you are going to be fine! You are right, good or bad, this experience formed part of your life.

Sorry for not visiting. I was kind of switched off from blogging for a while.

The World According To Me said...

Hi Shello

How you doing? Oh yes, being single can rock! No one to answer to, no one to bring you down, no one to let you down!

The World According To Me said...

Thanks for your comment waterlearner. How are you? I haven't been blogging much recently, I wish there were more hours in the day! Must pay you a visit. Hope you are well.