Monday, 6 April 2009

You win some, you loose some

In every good old fashioned love story there is nearly always a thunder bolt. A thunder bolt from out of the blue.
I thought my thunder bolt had struck, dear readers. In hindsight, it must have been the strobe lighting. Or maybe my right contact lens was flickering, creating the illusion that something strange had happened.
There I was, dancing away, black dress, brown boots, wine glass, when I saw him. There he was, standing still, black jumper, black jeans, beer bottle, when he saw me. He was tall, he was dark, he was handsome. And I had to turn around to be sure he was looking at me, and not a younger, prettier version.
When I realized he was definitely looking at me, I did something very out of character. I walked over to him and said hello. I figured I had nothing to loose. (Little did I know just how much I would loose. For example: sleep, my sanity, my dignity, my pride.)
We stood grinning at each other like a couple of loonies.
And that’s how it all began.
Now, if you were to ask any of my friends they will confirm that in every relationship I’ve had I have known the man in question since birth/school days/forever. I take my time getting to know future partners. I do not fall easily. I am cautious. I am not very trusting. I am skeptical. It takes me a long while to feel comfortable. Normally.
However, this is not a normal story.
We exchanged telephone numbers almost immediately.
We said that we had to see each other again.
We danced and smiled all night.
He text me as soon as we said goodbye.
He said it was amazing meeting me.
He said he couldn’t stop smiling.
I was smitten.
I couldn't stop smiling either.
I wondered what was happening to me?!
I felt like the girl in the chewing gum advert. The one you cringe at and wonder how someone could act so dopey around the opposite sex.
We shared four dates in one week.
He took me to an Italian restaurant, we ate pasta and swapped life stories.
We walked around Leicester Square holding hands.
We went to the cinema and talked about our love of dairy products.
We drank wine and Guinness in the pub.
We participated in the pub quiz and called ourselves Eclipse (after the tacky nightclub we met in).
He introduced me to his family!
His mother cooked me a roast dinner and his father talked about the family dog. They said it was nice to meet me and they were looking forward to seeing me again.
He downloaded George Michael songs for me to listen to! We sang Too Funky together.
He gave me an astrology book and spoke of the similarities between our star signs and how well matched we were.
He’s studied astrology and he drew my birth chart, after I commented that I’ve always been curious about it.
He spoke of the similarities between our birth charts and personalities.
We watched Dark Knight on DVD and I fell asleep on his sofa.
He kept smiling at me and holding my hand.
I never saw him again.
I am completely baffled.
What happened to him?
Why did he vanish?
How could someone change their mind so drastically?
What did I do wrong?
The worst thing is, I was doing okay. I was happy being single. I was happy with my life. I was content. I didn't need a man. I didn't particularly want a man. Then he came along, turned my whole world upside down, shook it, made everything seem perfect, and buggered off.
I text him. No answer.
I called him. No answer.
I worried that he’d been in a freak accident. Or lost his mobile. But lost mobile batteries die. Freak accidents aren’t that common.
He entered my life in a whirlwind. A whirlwind of emotions and anticipation.
He departed from my life in exactly the same way.


Blur Ting said...

Oh, let's hope he has a good reason or else... you maybe beter off without him. It's nice to meet someone who's such a good match only to find it doesn't last. It has happened to me before but don't worry, another better one will come along. You're pretty, fun, such a nice person and have a great personality, you deserve someone just as great!

Mike M said...

In this life we have many teachers. Some come in our lives for a long time and others come in just for a moment. But they all teach us something. Look for the lesions, not the accidents. There are no accidents.

Kate said...

Wha-? You're kidding! OK, that is not OK and not rational. He must have terrible flu. Or someone in his family has been sent to hospital. Surely, if this were a simple "not that into you" thing, he would have found some way to communicate that to you. And if not...if he really is this big an a**h***, it's a good thing you found out now that he's PSYCHO!

Nick Phillips said...

Maybe he's extremely shy and is working up the courage to call you again :D Hope things work out for you ...

jyankee said...

Wow... I tend to learn toward what everyone else has said...but hopefully you'll receive some kind of contact again...either way!

The Real Mother Hen said...


Goodness, you write so well, and beautifully. I found water bubbling up on the corner of my eyes while reading this.

If he's yours, he will come around.

If he doesn't. It never was.


Leigh Russell said...

Unless he has a genuine excuse for not even picking up the phone, the guy's a player. He needs to boost his feelings of insecurity by knowing he can attract gorgeous confident women (like you). Even if he contacts you again, I'd have nothing to do with him. What consideration has he given to your feelings? (Unless - back to beginning) You can drive yourself nuts going round in circles over a guy like this. Or was this a short story to get us all going?
I'm in ranting mode. have a glitch on their system. They insist my book's on their website, but it isn't. it's available through and other amazon sites around the world, as far away as New Zealand, but not on the uk site, which is depressing. It can be preordered online from many other uk sites including Waterstones, Borders, WH Smiths, etc, but as far as are concerned, Cut Short doesn't exist!

The World According To Me said...

Hello Blur

I'm afraid I still haven't heard from him. I guess he has his reasons, but it would have been nice of him to tell me what his reasons were, and why he had such a change of heart.
Thanks for your nice words, my confidence has taken a bashing so it was nice to hear something positive. Hope you're okay.

The World According To Me said...

Hello Mike

I am a firm believer in learning from experiences, turning negatives into positives. This time I must admit I'm stumped. I must have learnt something from him, probabaly not to get so swept away! But alas I fear this is a lesson I would rather not have experienced.
Be over to you again soon...

The World According To Me said...

Hello Kate

How are you doing? I've been thinking about you and will pay you a visit next.

Weird isn't it. No communication at all. He seemed so genuine, so interested and over whelmed in me and us. Then nothing. No explanation. No communication. Surely even someone with flu, or a family member in hospital, would have been in touch by now. Oh well, as I said - you win some, you loose some!

The World According To Me said...

Hello Nick

How are you?

I wish it was that simple. He still hasn't returned my texts or my call. He can't be that shy, surely. Never mind, life goes on! The world continues turning. And all that.

The World According To Me said...

Hello Jyankee

How are you?

Nothing I'm afraid, either way. I have driven myself and everyone I know nuts! Time to move on I guess.

The World According To Me said...

Hello The Real Mother Hen.

Thank you for saying that about my writing, that's one of the biggest compliments you could dish out!

You're right. If he was mine he would have come round. I guess that means he wasn't and it just wasn't meant to be. But boy, my fingers have been burnt to the bone!

Hope you're well.

The World According To Me said...

Hi Leigh

That sucks about Amazon UK! Can they sort it out? At least it can be ordered by other means. Right, I'm going web surfing to pre order mine. It's still very exciting! Try not to get too peed off about Amazon UK, they could fix it?

As for my post. Alas it wasn't a short story, it was a true story.
It happened to me! And I have gone round and round in circles trying to fathom it out. Sigh. He obviously wasn't the man I thought he was.

Dav DiDi said...

Oh ... why is he acting that way ?

Did you try going to his house? Well, if he just testing out on you or just being a jerk, he isn't worth for you ...

Handsome guys is 50% not trust worthy.. that's my opinion ..

Mary Smith said...

So well written!!! And I'm so sorry that it ended like that!! You deserve the best!

La Delirante said...

I agree with Kate's comment above.

I also agree with Dav Didi's comment re the 50% bit.

Some people are just weird. It's just simply not polite to ignore other people's messages and phone calls.

I hope he will call you to apologise and explain.

Good luck,

Amel's Realm said...

Well, at least he didn't pull you along for a longer period just to do this type of behavior, but I agree that this is the worst kind of behaviour, 'coz it only makes you wonder what went wrong, what's wrong with you, etc.

Of all the types of "break-ups" or whatever you call it (sorry my brain's tired), I think this is the most cruel one...the trickiest one...'coz it makes your mind think too much about many things...trying to answer so many questions...

Anyway, I agree with Blur Ting, deserve someone better than this!!!

Eryl Shields said...

Sounds like you had fun while it lasted, no loss of dignity there.

Leigh Russell said...

me in brief - thanks for your support. amazon now sorted. check my blog for details of my Virtual Book Launch. You're invited!

you - your experience is really disappointing. Why do people behave like that? It's no reflection on you - this guy has a problem. He probably can't help himself and I suppose we should feel sorry for him. But that doesn't help you. You sound strong enough to deal with this bitter experience but his behaviour is potentially very damaging. Let's hope he gets help before he does this again to someone else. When you're happy with your next boyfriend (who might be just around the next corner), this player will still be on his own, unable to form a genuine lasting relationship. I'm doing my best to feel sorry for him, but actually, I want to slap his face! How dare he treat you like that? You deserve so much better.

Kate said...

Hey, are you coming back soon? You haven't posted in almost a month! I miss you!

The World According To Me said...

Hey Kate

How you doing? Sorry I've been away for so long! Expect a post any time now!