Friday, 31 August 2007

The camera never lies

I am pleased to announce, I had a full, good old fashioned, eight hours sleep last night. I am announcing this with triumph because I have experienced a few problems recently, while trying to fall asleep.
Can you think of anything as frustrating as retiring to your bed, feeling peaky, snuggling under the duvet, and then suddenly feeling wide awake? Moving from one side of the bed to the other, practising deep breathing and trying to blank out any unnecessary thoughts that are entering your head. And then you make the fatal mistake of checking the time and you realise how long you have been lying there, unable to sleep, wasting precious sleeping time, and knowing how irritable and tired you will feel the next morning.
I’m sure you will agree that when it comes to the frustration list, insomnia is right at the top.
Yesterday, fearing another sleepless night, I decided to jot down any worries that I thought were interfering with my sleeping pattern. The list went something like this: finances, achievements, printers contract, body fat, the aging process.
Hmm. Not a very long list really, and hardly nail bitingly scary stuff. And then I felt guilty. There are people in this world waiting for life threatening test results or about to have their home repossessed. Now they are problems guaranteed to occupy your mind and prevent you from sleeping. Maybe there is a small compensation that my worries are at least solvable.
So, I have banned myself from reading bank statements and weighing myself before bed time. I have emailed one of my photographs to a newspaper and flicked through the latest Freelance Market News for fiction story ideas (this comes underneath the ‘achievements’ woe). I have invested in face cream and struck a deal with myself to visit the gym on a regular basis. I have also discussed the printers contract with the extremely tall publisher. The ball is in his court now.
I’m afraid I don’t have the answers for world peace or Saturdays winning lottery numbers, but I did have a lovely nights sleep last night.
Of course the glasses of wine I drank might have contributed towards my new ability to drift into slumber land. My friend Eve invited myself and two other friends for dinner last night. It was a very pleasant evening.
Although I wasn’t quite sure what I had walked into at first, my friend Claire’s face was as long as a kite.
“What’s up?” I said to her, feeling very concerned.
“We’ve been looking at old photos of us. We were so young and thin,” Claire replied.
I took a photograph from her hand, to see the cause of her sad face. I actually stared blankly at one of the smiling faces on the photograph, and then I realised the smiling face was me! Now it was my turn to feel depressed. My skin was youthful and healthy. No blemishes, no wrinkles, no worry/frown lines! And just look at how thin I was!
Eve did not help. “Look how young, thin and pretty your face was,” she said.
I tortured myself further, I dug into my friend Eve’s box and took out pictures of us from a summer holiday, many, many summers ago. We managed to take a roll of film in one drunken night, and then when the film finished, we thought we hadn’t put the roll in correctly, so we put it back in and started again. The result was double exposure pictures. Heads that do not match bodies, and faces overlapping other faces. They are very weird. We were horrified when we first saw the pictures, but we soon found the funny side. It certainly was a night, with photographic evidence, to remember. That was also the night we accidentally went back to our hotel in a police car. Don’t ask.
"Look at my waist!" I screamed at one of the pictures.
That was the moment we decided to put the pictures back into the box, sit down, eat the hors d'oevres and crack open a bottle of wine.

Picture of the day:

The Rudbeckia's

9 comments:

JYankee said...

dont REMIND me!!! ha.

The World According to Me said...

Hi Jyankee

Sorry for the reminder!

Hope you are having a nice weekend.

patience of a saint said...

OMG, just how long ago was that photo? I can remember the one in question and once again I am pregnant? Too depressing I am afraid, well it happens to the best of us.

So sorry to hear about your insomnia problem, it is very frustrating but I hope your new way of writing things down helps, either that or bottles of wine.

Just remember you are lovely the way you are and it is wants inside that counts and you can't fault that. You can always rely on Eve too make you feel better; NOT.

See you soon xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

Kate said...

And the ugly truth is that, when we were young and cute, we took it for granted and didn't care! Give me back my unveined hands and perky boobs! I promise I'll appreciate them now!

The World According to Me said...

Hi Patience

How are you?

The first picture I saw I must have been about 19 or 20? It was the early Bridge House days. And boy, did I look different!

Arr yes, there are many, many pictures of you pregnant! It would be correct to say that you have been pregnant a fair few times honey.

Thank you for your kind words about being lovely the way I am. It is the inside that counts, as you say. And inside I am a thin person trying to get out!

The World According to Me said...

Hi Kate

Hope you are well.

You are dead right there. At the time you don't appreciate your youthful figure and skin.
I promise I would appreciate them now too!

Rebecca said...

Ah, yes, pictures from my 20s used to really set me back! But since I can't change it, I have given up feeling all that bad about it. Laugh lines and gray hair are fine. It's the ongoing assault of gravity that gets me now.....

Rebecca said...

oh, and glad to hear you are sleeping better! That same thing happens to me on Sunday nights when my brain is already zooming about the week ahead. Frustrating beyond measure!

The World According to Me said...

Hi Rebecca

Those damn 20's pictures! I suppose you could say my face has more character these days, and it took a lot of money (on food and drink) to get a body like mine!

I'm sleeping much better now thanks. It's very, very frustrating when you're mind won't switch off!